No, I haven’t gone and found myself a husband and just forgotten to share it with you all!
You know me better than that by now – you would have heard all the details I’m sure. Having said that, being single for the better part of 10 years is now getting a little boring, and I’m ready to meet my someone, so Universe if you’re listening: bring him on!
Of course, when I do meet the love of my life, in time we’ll be able to decide that we want to spend our lives together, get engaged and get married. I’m thinking on a beach on a warm island somewhere – although this could be because it’s freezing cold in Sydney today and the thought of being anywhere warm sounds ideal right about now.
But I digress. This post isn’t about me saying I Do, this post is about the basic human right to love the person you love, and (if you so choose) to commit yourself to that person for your version of forever.
When I made the decision to have Love Bug on my own, there were varying reactions from people – from good for you, you brave girl – that’s the best thing I’ve ever heard because you’ve always wanted to be a mumma right through to how dare you bring a child into this world alone – children deserve the right to two parents – and everything in between. A lot of these comments and opinions were thrust upon me, whether I wanted to hear them or not. Of course, I was happy to chat more to those with the former opinion, and those who had the latter opinion have disappeared from my life (or were complete strangers to begin with)!
People who know us – in person or through our blog – know how happy we are as a family unit. Sure, we have our bumpy days – but this is not because Bubba has only one parent in situ. Friends with bubbas the same age are going through the same things we are – they just get to share the number of times they get out of bed each night! People comment about how gorgeous and happy Bubba is, how she’s a great sharer, and generally what a lovely little person she’s growing into. We’re living proof that a happy family unit that doesn’t have to necessarily fit society’s general expectation.
I sat enjoying the company of my sister and my cousin last night.
My sister has married the same boy twice. The first time they were married in the courtyard of their Chicago apartment block, with a handful of people to witness their union (which they did for Visa reasons). The second time was a little over a year ago in a beautiful ceremony in Sydney. This time I was honoured to stand beside them and share their love.
My cousin has been in a relationship for almost seven years. We love the person he loves.
The person is family to us. And has been for a long time. We share interests in lots of things (including cooking, which now that I think about it, may be the only thing I’m not 100% about – as this person’s cooking skills may out-shine mine)! This person loves Bubba to bits and pieces. So much so that she has her very own set of gorgeous blocks to play with when we visit their home. This person got Love Bug in our Christmas Secret Santa last year – and was totally excited and spoiled her rotten.
I wish (and so do they) that they could be married. But because my cousin and the person he loves are both boys, they can’t legally be married in this country.
Which leads me to the point of this post. Yesterday morning there was a launch of the “I Do” campaign in Sydney. The campaign supports marriage equality. Australia is the only English-speaking developed country with a leader who doesn’t support the basic human right to marry the person you love.
That has to change. And I’m not the only one who thinks so.
My view on this subject may not be your view on the subject. If that is the case, and you are okay to keep reading my blog, thank you for accepting that we are all different – and that’s not only okay, but something to celebrate.
If you would like to stop reading my blog because of my views on this subject, I’m okay with that too. Because you have the right to choose.
Isn’t it a shame that basic right doesn’t extend to everyone?
bumpyroadtobubba 
I hope the I Do Campaign gets results. I also hope the results come quickly and once-and-for-all. Around here there’s plenty of lip service, but slow results. And in some places with marriage equality, the threat hangs ominously overhead that it may be repealed! Ugh.
Ugh is right!!
Here, here! And thank you for sharing your story. Here’s mine. when I was growing up, I had the best relationship with my brother. He was protective, loving & fun to be around. During the 20 years he was married to my sister-in-law, he became increasingly withdrawn, grumpy & honestly a hard to be around – he was miserable. My wonderful husband only knew of him to be like this & could not fathom he was the same person I use to tell him about when I was growing up. Then several years ago, my brother got to the bottom of his unhappiness. He loved his wife and his kids, but he realised he had been living a lie – a heterosexual relationship – the life society & I guess family expected of him. After finally realising he only has one life to be happy, he left his marriage. He is now in a monogomous relationship with a really sweet guy. He is the protective, loving, fun brother I grew up with again. My husband now sees the brother I have spoke so fondly of. Fortunately, most of our family are totally supportive. We are so pleased he his happy again – you see we all feared for him before. We feared he was depressed & who knows what would come of that if he continued in his downward slide. Now he is living a life of happiness, one which he deserves – just like everyone. For the record, we all love our sister-in-law from his marriage too. We are happy she has also found love again in the arms of a man – a love that she deserves!
Wow Bel, I never knew that! It’s lovely that both your brother and your sister-in-law are happy. x
I work in the sexual health field and have many dear friends who are gay and lesbian, a large number of whom are in long term lovely relationships. It saddens and disgusts me that they cannot get married here in Australia. These archaic beliefs and restrictions need to be removed!
I TOTALLY agree with you! Mutual love and respect between two adults should always be celebrated. I hope this campaign sees some great results. I wish we could change the minds of some people on this continent, too!
I completely agree, well said. 🙂
The US has some states that allow gay marriage, but the federal government doesn’t recognize it. So gay/lesbian couples can marry in some places but still don’t have the legal rights that marriage affords straight people.
Love is love x