Why are they so often intertwined so your heart feels despair and pure joy simultaneously? I am so excited, today is the first day of an incredible chapter of my life, but I wonder how can I be feeling all of these things at once: excited, terrified, happy, anxious, nervous, sad, tired, disillusioned, scared, certain, uncertain, strong and confident.

I don’t think I’ve ever felt any lonelier or more alone than I did this morning. Walking into the fertility clinic on my own to get the download for everything that’s about to happen was really overwhelming. So much so that when the lovely nurse got half way through explaining something to do with needles I started to cry – sob really. And not just because I HATE needles!